Last night Don Juan played a very mean trick on me.
Background info: my neighbor's parents have a farm. She went home to visit this past weekend and brought back a ton of fresh veggies, some of which she shared with me.
Back to the story...dinner last night was a bit of a hodgepodge but there were a bunch of peppers in the veggie bag so DJ decided he'd throw them on the grill and roast them. I think there were two different shades of green and a red one, all long peppers. Thing was, we weren't really sure if they were hot or not.
At the end of dinner we decided to give them a try. The first green one was charred beyond recognition. The second green one was OK, it had a touch of heat but wasn't bad. Last up was the red one. Apparently DJ tried a tiny piece of it and it was SPICY. Of course I was so glued to the TV (needed to see the Next Food Network Star finale which I had dvr'ed), that I didn't notice the face he made.
Being the generous boyfriend he is, he gave me a nice big chunk of the red pepper to try (with lots of seeds). Being the trusting girlfriend I am, I put it in my mouth. As you know, spice evolves so at first it was fine. Then the heat grew and grew and grew. I ultimately spit it out (as you'll see below) but not before it engulfed my mouth in flames and I accidentally swallowed a seed.
Holy friggin' cow! I don't think I have ever eaten something this spicy. First thought...milk. Too bad I don't drink milk so I didn't have any. Second thought, cheese. I start chomping on some mozz and while it helps while it's in my mouth, the second I swallow it, the burn is back. Next thought...bread. Again, no bread in the house. So I grab the pretzels. And again, while I'm eating, it's fine, but the moment I stop it burns. Not to mention that the seed that I swallowed seemed to be eating away at my esophagus and upper stomach. Nice.
It finally passed and by then I was sweating like crazy. We were laughing the whole time, but I did accuse him of trying to kill me by letting me eat that pepper.
The irony of this story, at least in my opinion, is that I had gone to the doctor earlier for my breathing issues and instead of her saying it was in fact lung related, she told me it was likely related to my stomach and reflux issues. I'm sure the burning hot pepper was only going to help with those issues.